white girls are having a crisis, y’all.I’m so embarrassed oh my god why
okay but like. girls being made fun of for liking things that are either marketed toward them or popular (or both) is REALLY prevalent?? and like?? sexist?? like blatantly sexist??? and if you actually read the article its like?? talking about destroying the idea that a girl is “less than” just bc she likes popular stuff? like man that’s important please stop
The bolded excerpt from the article captures it really well.
"Liking something popular doesn’t make you lame. Discounting someone for having some of those same interests does."
And this is something that happens pretty exclusively to women. The article even points it out. When men enjoy things that are popular among men, no one comments on in, certainly not in a negative way. No one laughs at men for liking CrossFit, or beer, or watching football. It’s okay for men to like things that lots of men like because mens’ interests are good and valuable from a societal perspective. Because men are good and valuable. But when women like things, those things become the subject of shitty, sexist jokes that further the belittlement of the interests of women and women in general.
This is just another way for men to shit on women and to further brainwash women and girls with internalized misogyny. This becomes another case of “I’m not like other girls.”
"Oh she likes pumpkin spice lattes and Sex in the City? That’s so gross and lame. I like Guinness and WWE. I’m just not like other girls."
As though being like others girls is so bad. But thanks to the idea that liking what other girls like makes you a “basic bitch” and thus lame and to be laughed at, another generation of girls is growing up thinking that women and the things they enjoy are detestable and to be laughed at while the interests of men are somehow superior and preferable. That girls doing things that make them happy is some sort of sad joke.
And that’s complete bullshit.
Elizabeth Minkel on Why it doesn’t matter what Benedict Cumberbatch thinks of Sherlock fan fiction. (via piningjohn)
You want to say Hi to the cute girl on the subway. How will she react? Fortunately, I can tell you with some certainty, because she’s already sending messages to you. Looking out the window, reading a book, working on a computer, arms folded across chest, body away from you = do not disturb. So, y’know, don’t disturb her. Really. Even to say that you like her hair, shoes, or book. A compliment is not always a reason for women to smile and say thank you. You are a threat, remember? You are Schrödinger’s Rapist. Don’t assume that whatever you have to say will win her over with charm or flattery. Believe what she’s signaling, and back off.
If you speak, and she responds in a monosyllabic way without looking at you, she’s saying, “I don’t want to be rude, but please leave me alone.” You don’t know why. It could be “Please leave me alone because I am trying to memorize Beowulf.” It could be “Please leave me alone because you are a scary, scary man with breath like a water buffalo.” It could be “Please leave me alone because I am planning my assassination of a major geopolitical figure and I will have to kill you if you are able to recognize me and blow my cover.”
On the other hand, if she is turned towards you, making eye contact, and she responds in a friendly and talkative manner when you speak to her, you are getting a green light. You can continue the conversation until you start getting signals to back off.
The fourth point: If you fail to respect what women say, you label yourself a problem.
There’s a man with whom I went out on a single date—afternoon coffee, for one hour by the clock—on July 25th. In the two days after the date, he sent me about fifteen e-mails, scolding me for non-responsiveness. I e-mailed him back, saying, “Look, this is a disproportionate response to a single date. You are making me uncomfortable. Do not contact me again.” It is now October 7th. Does he still e-mail?
Yeah. He does. About every two weeks.
This man scores higher on the threat level scale than Man with the Cockroach Tattoos. (Who, after all, is guilty of nothing more than terrifying bad taste.) You see, Mr. E-mail has made it clear that he ignores what I say when he wants something from me. Now, I don’t know if he is an actual rapist, and I sincerely hope he’s not. But he is certainly Schrödinger’s Rapist, and this particular Schrödinger’s Rapist has a probability ratio greater than one in sixty. Because a man who ignores a woman’s NO in a non-sexual setting is more likely to ignore NO in a sexual setting, as well.
So if you speak to a woman who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps her right to be left alone. If you pursue a conversation when she’s tried to cut it off, you send a message. It is that your desire to speak trumps her right to be left alone. And each of those messages indicates that you believe your desires are a legitimate reason to override her rights.
For women, who are watching you very closely to determine how much of a threat you are, this is an important piece of data."
an excerpt from Phaedra Starling’s “Schrödinger’s Rapist: or a guy’s guide to approaching strange women without being maced” (via lostgrrrls)
HOLY FUCK THE TRUTH.
Can every one of my male followers read this? And please, before you get defensive (“I would never rape anyone!”) keep in mind, women being afraid of Shrodinger’s Rapists (oh my god i still can’t get over the encompassing brilliance of this phrase) is a conditioned, learned response from being immersed in rape culture and the evolution of sexism and sexual violence in our society from the day we’re born. And unfortunately, it’s very difficult to unlearn without the efforts of all genders to dismantle it. Which is where you come in.
It’s also just rude and disrespectful to patently ignore what someone has told you regarding their personal space, body, and time. Get a clue.
I will always reblog this. Always.
So if you speak to a woman who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps her right to be left alone.